Aug 22, Forgiving Infidelity

Need help Forgiving Infidelity?

Infidelity is probably the worst offense that one partner can inflict on another. It completely destroys every shred of trust that there was in the marriage or relationship and is utterly devastating. In fact the more trust there was in the relationship to begin with the more pain the other party will feel. For some people infidelity is the end of the line or point of no return, they have decided long ago that when the trust is gone so is the relationship. However, you would be surprised at the number of people who actually work through this kind of betrayal and restore their relationship by forgiving infidelity.

If you are a partner that has decided that forgiving infidelity is your choice, you are probably facing a thousand questions from those around you about why. Each person will have their own answer to this question, but many times, it is a combination of things.

When a couple has children, many times they will try harder to keep the relationship together for the kid?s sake. Particularly if the cheating was an isolated incidence or most other aspects of the relationship are great, people will try it.Women are more prone to forgiving infidelity than men are, and one reason may be that secretly she feels responsible for the affair. This could be part of what you are feeling if your husband or boyfriend has cheated on you. While it is true that no relationship is destroyed by one partner, you should be careful about how much responsibility you take for infidelity because it is a slippery slope. Before you know it, you could be in a relationship with chronic cheating.

Love is probably the number one reason a person will forgive their partner for infidelity. Just because your spouse or significant other has been, an idiot does not mean that love just shrivels up and dies on the spot. If it did then all people could move on rather quickly and not suffer the pain and anguish.

The process of forgiving infidelity is a long and involved one and believe it or not the choice to forgive or not is the easy part. Working out that forgiveness is where the work comes in and you may find it hard to locate good advice on the best way to do this.Infidelity advice is probably best found outside of your current circle of friends. Many of them will probably be angry with your partner for you and have very little to offer in the way of good advice. It is often helpful to seek out marriage counseling to help the both of you work through the infidelity together. A counselor will be an unbiased third party who can guide you in constructive ways of getting past the hurt and anger.

At some point in this process for a relationship to progress forward from an infidelity, you have to have trust. The very element that was destroyed by the cheating is an essential piece of the puzzle and it can be very hard to accomplish.

The bottom line is that you will need help; no one should try to overcome something like this alone. Counselors and loved ones can offer advice and support but sometimes you may still need something more. This is where an infidelity forum can help. When you are up at three in the morning struggling with the pain and doubts this can be a place to talk with others who have experienced what you are going through and guide you through. The toughest part of forgiving infidelity is the day-to-day struggle you are bound to have.

You can join our Surviving Infidelity Facebook group or our Infidelity Forum or visit our Infidelity Resources page for quick links to more help.

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